My head is a non stop thinking machine. I don’t know how other people minds works but mine most of times is annoying. I can be okay for a while, for a day, whatever amount of time, it only takes a very insignificant situation to pull in all the bad thoughts. I can’t find a way to shut off my mind of telling me bad things about me. My mind tells me I am not good enough and puts me down. I want to shut it off, but the people who triggered this are still there. I know can’t blame them for this because I am the one thinking these thoughts.It really hard to live like this. I’m the kind of person who always avoid doing something wrong because of this. I don’t want all these bad feelings again. I don’t like letting people down because it proves me my foolishness and confirms me how I am such a bad person. I am not good enough and people can’t understand this and they still believe in me and I keep letting them down.
I need to write this down because I can’t find another way to let these thoughts go away, I can’t shut up my mind. I feel helpless. Since I can’t take my mind out, I spit it out with words.
i write this because I needed to let this all out and make it public because I hope to find people like me.
Thanks for reading.